


ambrosia

by orphan_account



Category: Persona 2, Persona Series
Genre: M/M, non canon compliant ending bc EP makes me Deep Pressed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-08
Updated: 2019-02-08
Packaged: 2019-10-24 06:25:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17699303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: “Was it the wrong thing to say?” Tatsuya asks. “I just - said how I feel.”





	ambrosia

**Author's Note:**

> ending is not canon compliant on purpose because EP is too much for my fragile little soul

Leo temple is  _ hot hot hot _ , hotter than any summer day, and Tatsuya has to keep wiping the sweat from his temple every other minute. It feels almost angry, the whole place humming with some barely restrained rage. The others are in the same state - he watches Jun peel his hair from his face out of the corner of his eye. 

 

Tatsuya thinks about it, as they climb - how he feels at home here, remembered by his friends - how the way his memories had come flooding back in Mt. Iwato had felt like coming home. How seeing Jun,  _ finally Jun, not Joker,  _ sprawled out in Maya’s lap with tears on his cheeks had felt like coming home most of all. 

 

He wonders - he knows the answer, now, but still - if it was always like this. If Jun’s casual touch had always made his heart beat just a little bit faster - if he had always wanted to take his hand the way he does now. If he had always felt like this - like here, at Jun’s side was more of a home than the house he grew up in.

 

(He did. He does. He remembers.)

 

—

Tatsuya hates the shadows.

 

Lisa’s is the first one they’ve actually  _ fought -  _ but he saw them before, crowded round Joker, and the sickness he felt then was no stronger than what he feels now, looking at the unnatural grin sitting on his friend’s face.

 

(Except, that’s not her - that’s all the dark and none of the light.)

 

“What about all that other stuff you did, huh?” the shadow drawls out. Tatsuya watches Lisa clench her fists in front of him.

 

“All those nassssty drugs? And swindling all that money from perverted old men?” the shadow continues. The voice is off, Tatsuya notices - it echoes, slightly, as if it’s coming from the inside of an empty room. “You say you hate standing out, hate being different, but you  _ want  _ to be noticed!”

 

“You’re right,” Lisa says, her fists unclenching. “I was pathetic for a long time, but I found what I lost. You should  _ remember,  _ if you’re me! My dream, from ten years ago - it was to marry my first love, Tatsuya!”

 

Tatsuya was -  _ aware  _ of Lisa’s feelings, all things considered, but-

 

“Hah,” the shadow laughs, all teeth, cocking its head. Its demeanour quickly turns mean. “Shut  _ up.  _ That Tatsuya died back then - the one I loved. So he’ll  _ always  _ be mine!”

 

“I won’t let anyone tell me how  _ I _ feel!” Lisa stamps her feet. “My feelings are mine, and Tatsuya’s are his own - you can’t take that!”

 

“I don’t give a  _ damn _ how that Tatsuya feels,” the shadow snarls. “He is  _ mine _ and  _ mine alone!” _

 

“Enough!” Lisa demands. “Get her!”

 

—

 

After all is said and done, Tatsuya is - vaguely uncomfortable. And exhausted. And - relieved, really.

 

“Tatsuya,” Lisa says, turning to him. “Don’t worry about what I said earlier. I just had to speak my mind.” She laughs, a nervous thing. “Not the best time to bring this up, is it?”

 

She says  _ don’t worry about it  _ but Tatsuya knows he can’t leave her without an answer - not with the way everyone is looking at him. His hand finds the lighter in his pocket, and he runs his thumb over the engraving in the metal.

 

He tries to imagine it - taking her hand, letting her rest her head in the crook of his neck, staying up late just  _ talking  _ to her, sharing his bed with her - and he can’t, not with Lisa. But, with someone else…

 

“I only have eyes for Jun,” he says, plain and simple, because this - this  _ is  _ simple, and meant, and it was always going to end up like this. 

 

“Ah!” Lisa laughs, but it’s not angry, “you’re free to love whoever, I guess! But still,” she walks down the steps to meet him, “I’m sure one day I’ll be able to make you turn your head!”

 

Tatsuya nods.

 

(He doubts it.)

 

—

 

“What you said at the temple…” Jun begins as they walk back together, turning to face Tatsuya, his face illuminated by the moon (Tatsuya swears it looks bigger tonight, like he could just pluck it out of the sky). 

 

“Was it the wrong thing to say?” Tatsuya asks, his brow creasing, hand already reaching for the lighter in his pocket. “I just - said how I feel.”

 

“Really,” Jun breathes out, like he can’t believe it. His hands are clasped in front of him, and Tatsuya will pretend he can’t see the slight tremor in them, if it will make Jun feel better. “Really?” he repeats.

 

Tatsuya nods.

 

“Well,” Jun’s face breaks out into a grin. “I - feel the same way, you know.” He takes Tatsuya’s hands in his own much smaller pair, and smiles up at him. Tatsuya’s face breaks out into a small smile, too, before he realises it. He holds Jun’s hand the whole way home.

 

(Later, Jun will fall asleep in Tatsuya’s too small bed with his head buried into the crook of his neck - but before he does, he will lie in Tatsuya’s arms and think  _ even Heaven wants to cradle the Earth sometimes. _

 

Tatsuya will remember this, on some faraway summer day, lighter in hand - because he didn’t feel  _ right _ not having one to hold onto, didn’t feel whole.

 

Won’t feel whole again until, one day, he meets Jun’s eyes from across the room, somehow - somewhere - and it will feel like coming home again.

 

This time, he will stay.)


End file.
